Just How far would you go?

Just How far would you go ? 

I Bumped into my of one my old friend ( Matty ) in the gym today after my tiring fitness class. This year my resolution is to make myself more attractive to catch the right bird therefore gym bunny or you rather it being called regular gym goer fits into my description of new year resolution. It had been always the same resolution for the past few years as the old saying goes “ survival of the fittest “ , ain’t fit ain’t going anywhere in your journey of looking for the right bird for the right love, well at least in our rainbow community I have come to the acceptance of “ guys love to look at attractive things which might be the first step in opening up the soul window in getting to know each other.” 

 So after the class, I sat down in the lounge with Matty to catch up on his life, especially the subject of love. He is in a long distance relationship which has been going on for almost 6 months now and he will be going to introduce his partner to his family soon in February, the red festive holiday, Chinese New year. It was truly a blessing to see everyone getting hitched and ready to move forward initiating the step in getting closer to one’s personal life including ones’s family. As long as the long distance relationship sounds, he does not mind flying 4 hours to another country just to meet his partner up over the short weekends. It becomes short although both of them are living apart more than a thousand miles. Matty is optimistic and goes out from his heart all the way to pursue his love dream regardless of the distance and time difference. If you asked me, I think I will be to exhausted travelling to and fro and lack of sleep would trigger my cranky side which nobody ever want to see. At times, he would even offer to call him up as a reminder of his important events ahead and even at wee hours given the time difference. Not just that , he also reached out to understand his partner’s social life. Yes as sweet as it might sound, all relationship has its own fair share of conflicts , especially in the period of discovering one another. The conflict started to stir as he gets to know his partner’s social life in depth.

 We all have that one friend, whom we called as bestie or BFF ( Best friends forever) to talk to us when we needed the most despite looking like a zombie without the need to put up a good look when meeting up. Unfortunately, the situation between Matty and his partner’s bestie did not sound too good. For instance, clash of objectives in life and some sort like a yin vs yang energy influencer in his partner’s life. So the struggle is real for Matty to either sway his partner to him and vice versa for his partner’s bestie. It is not easy and I know Matty is rational enough to let loose and not to loose his head over the conflict created by his partner’s bestie. Beastie to Matty but bestie to his partner. So there you go, the balance he needed to go through and eventually to find a way out to resolve beastie vs bestie issues that might surface more in the future to come as they go down the road together. As I was telling Matty, the love- hate relationship between two people is never ever just between him and his partner, but it does revolve around people who plays a certain role in our social background. Believe me you, if anyone has ever told you that the society influencers such as friends, family, work, environment and etc.. just to name a few are redundant in a relationship, that person must have had low sense of awareness of things of happening around or choose to ignore until one day the issue is significant enough to break the relationship apart. Speaking from my experience unless somebody would like to challenge it. Consequently, accepting somebody into your life involves accepting the person’s as a whole and that would include his partner’s bestie in Matty’s situation.


 Just as I was able to conclude the piece of the day , my phone buzzed with a text from my friend, ( dragon) inspirational quote of relationship which runs:



“ Seize the opportunity when it is knocking on your door. Each lifestyle we choose come with either sorrows or joys. In addition to it , nothing is permanent in this world so enjoy while you still have the opportunity to do so.”
Lots of questions popped up in my head and I texted back below :

“ How Do you know when it’s the right door? “

“ How do you safeguard your heart from getting hurt if you choose to open the door which you think it is the right one?”

“ Are we ready to accept the aftermath of opening the door to reveal all yourself including your flaws to the person you think might be the right one?”


“ Is there anything we could do to minimise the risks of opening the wrong door?”
Another buzz from the old wise one ( dragon who is one of my besties after refining his words in the text message),

there is no right or wrong in the relationship, it’s a choice you choose and be able to have the courage to face it. In life we take risk and even the perfect plan you have planned for a long time in your head might turn up to be the plan you absolutely have no control over. Yes in another word, it is unpredictable but having said that , are you gonna just stay put and not move on to try again. There is no one right single answer to the question.

At the the back of my mind, it narrowed down to my topic of the day again “ How far would you go for, in a relationship or for a relationship?”